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Subject: The Chair That Ate My Pants
When I first spied this Ryan Korban furry chair I couldn’t get it out of my head. The use of texture and line were delicious and I wanted to have some of that glamour in my place. Of course I didn’t have Ryan Korban fur chair money, but I did have a hot glue gun, an old faux fur throw from JcPenney’s and a $2 office chair purchased nine years ago!
In my mind it was all simple enough: cover the chair with the faux fur throw and enjoy its furry glamour on the cheap. Naturally, nothing is ever that simple, particularly when I am no stranger to craft fails, especially CHAIR related craft fails. I must be up to six or seven now!
For starters, being an old chair, the screws were stripped and rusted, which meant there was nothing short of miracle that could liberate the seat cushion from the base. No worries, I’ll just work around this limitation. So with the pieces semi-neatly measured and cut, I began the painstaking task of hot gluing them to the chair. Except, well the pieces were not sticking to the chair, but to each other and my fingers. Yet somehow this setback neither deterred me nor alert me to the coming doom.
Once I managed to get the pieces in place I decided they ought to have some weight to keep everything together until they could really dry. Since I don’t actually have any real tools – for this job or any other – I opted to use my body weight to secure the fabric to the chair.
The hot glue seeped through the cheap faux fur and without knowing adhered itself to my PANTS. This only became apparent when I tried to stand up and found that my already raggedy stretch pants had ripped and the rear section was stuck to the chair.
In my wildest craft failest dreams and given all the ways that my craft fail chairs had ruined other pairs of pants, ripping the pants off my body was a new experience.
Maybe I ought to market my chair for Vegas strip clubs where this feature wouldn’t be considered a design flaw.
This whole experience will now conclude with another piece of furniture bound for the trash heap. At least I got my first craft fail of the year out of the way.