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One, two, Freddy’s… just laughing at you really.

sexy freddy kreuger costume

The inspiration costume

From: Cakefortwo
My website:
Subject: One, two, Freddy’s… just laughing at you really.

Back in September, i had this crazy idea. The fiance and I were going to go as a “Couple” for Halloween! (every other year we failed to match at all… i wanted to be kitschy and cute and damnit i was tired of women hitting on him!  So after planning all of August, we decided to go as his favorite Movie horror! (no, not Godzilla. Freddy Kreuger!) How is this a couple you ask? Simple!! I was going as the sexy Freddy-Krueger-chick in the picture! But one problem… I’m, er… BIG to say the least! (about a 3x or so!) So none of the costumes i could buy would fit me.  What’s a poor girl to do??

Instead of saying “Hey dear, why don’t we just go as zombies!?” i decided to put my — then — newbie crochet skills to the test! After all, i was tired of making scarves and potholders… i wanted to make something i could WEAR! i wanted to make something (like so many of us do!) that made others say “Wow! YOU made that!?” and i could nod, polish my knuckles and go “You betcha ladies.”

Oh dear… Well, for starters, I was fed up with there being no patterns in my size for free… (let alone one in my size to buy!  So i figured “I’ll modify one!” — (if i had a nickel for every time i read/heard that, Bill gates would be green with envy…

So i searched up a simple pattern on Ravelry, plopped my computer down on the table, and started crocheting (Bah! Who needs to measure!?? just hold it up and see if it fits, right?? RIGHT!)

Secondly, my colors weren’t QUITE Freddy… more… Pukey-Christmas. (Although i loved the blood-red Caron soft i was using!  the green on the other hand was more of a “dying pine-tree”…)

The stripes were consistent, the edging was nice, i was proud! I went through three seasons of “The Addams Family” dvd’s the hubbs had gotten us — and literally TWO NIGHTS before Halloween, i finished the torso. (not even the neck, not the sleeves — JUST. THE. TORSO.) Needless to say, i was scrapped for time, and nearly in tears — but things only got worse when i decided to slip-stitch the two halves together (i didn’t work in the round…) and work from there.

crochet freddy kreuger costume fail

The picture you see there? That was the FRONT PANEL. Not the two halves put together…. I know i’m big, but DANG.

In the end, I slipped it on just for picture purposes, and could literally fit my fiance and I inside of it — er… if it wasn’t for the fact that my original chain stitch (I suffered from EXTREME tight-stitch-itus) barely fit around my hips. Go me.

Fortunately for me, My mother came up with the idea that i could simply go as a Fairy this year — reusing my “mother nature” costume from last year, but we’d dye it! I’ll be a gothic creepy fairy! (or something?? i dunno.. it was Clearance day at the costume-supply store down the road o.O). So one bottle of Rit-Dye and a wash later, my brilliantly green and gold dress my mother had stitched together out of a Goodwill bedskirt — was grey. Not a “ooh lookit me i’m Gothy” grey — not even a Dr. Who Weeping Angels grey… no, it was a puke-inducing sickly green-grey that if found in nature, you should probably get away from as quickly as possible before its disease spreads any further.

Needless to say, i was in absolute TEARS… This was the first big college party i’d been invited to, and i was DAMNED on impressing people!!

After giving up and dooming myself to another lame zombie costume (which in all fairness turn our pretty good…) my mother was able to wash the dye right out (one wash with a little bleach and it was back to normal. Go figure…) So tossing together some lame costumery, I ended up as “Mother nature with-wings”.

We then proceeded to get lost on a 3 hour drive — for another 3 hours. ending our trip to the college campus and missing the party by 2 hours.

Though everything turned out fine and happy in the end (we found our friends, hung out and had general fun anyways AND found our way home safely!) I swore to NEVER do anything that ambitious again on that short of a time line with such little experience!

After all, i’m giving myself 9 months to come up with a Labyrinth-themed costume this year ;-) lmao

One Response to One, two, Freddy’s… just laughing at you really.

  1. val says:

    your story is hysterical! I wish I’d seen all the fails though…bet they were funny!

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