CraftFail http://craftfail.com Where Crafters Go to Fail Wed, 01 Oct 2014 15:00:19 +0000 en-US hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=4.0 CocoNOT Ice http://craftfail.com/2014/10/coconot-ice/ http://craftfail.com/2014/10/coconot-ice/#comments Wed, 01 Oct 2014 15:00:19 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7111 Read More »]]> coconut ice

Coconut ice recipes, like this one from allrecipes.com, are quick, easy and, if the warnings on Pinterest are to be believed, highly addictive!

Best of all, it’s a no-bake dessert – and since so many food fails are the result of flawed baking, burning or otherwise botching the cooking process, this one should be nearly impossible to mess up!

Umm… hello?

Okay, maybe that’s not entirely true. Especially when you’ve put a bunch of pressure on yourself with the decision to turn coconut ice into TOTALLY AMAZING gifts for everyone you know.

Or, as Maggi of Just Add Glitter and Stir explains,”This is a simple no bake dessert treat and when you take the time to mess it up correctly, it’s sure to be a hit with your family and make your smarter, more literate friends green with envy.”

Hmm, that sounds ominous…

coconut ice fail

Truly, you owe it to yourself to visit Maggi’s site and read her hilarious 6-step instructions for getting this recipe all wrong. There’s even a Snuggi GIF! Enough said.

coconut ice nailed it

For more half-baked (okay, no-bake) humor, head to Hollow Tree Ventures where Robyn’s sure to be both failing and eating something that looks like failure.

 

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Bears, Peanut Butter and Fungus – Oh My! http://craftfail.com/2014/09/bears-peanut-butter-and-fungus-oh-my/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/bears-peanut-butter-and-fungus-oh-my/#comments Mon, 29 Sep 2014 15:00:59 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7084 Read More »]]> peanut butter bears via The Toddler Cookbook by Annabel Karmel

Allow me to introduce you to… peanut butter bears! You can find the recipe in The Toddler Cookbook by Annabel Karmel, but at the risk of spoiling the surprise, you pretty much just smoosh Rice Krispies and peanut butter together into a head shape, then smoosh candy onto the head in a face shape. Even your toddler can do it (thus the title of the cookbook)! Before you know it, you’ll have a plate of smirking, severed bear heads ready to stare up at your child blankly with unblinking candy eyes.

YUMMY! Snack time is fun!

Because she loves both feeding and terrifying children, Allison Hart (friend of CraftFail and professional parentfailer at Motherhood, WTF?) wanted fun/creepy snack time, too!

peanut butter bears fail

I believe I’ll call this recipe “Crumbling Fozzie Bear With Unevenly Dilated Pupils Stains His Mouth On a Blue Sucker and Gets a Fungal Infection In His Ear.”

Huh, I wonder why no one’s offered me a cookbook deal yet.

nailed it - peanut butter bears

For more funny and peanut buttery parenting failure, follow Robyn to Hollow Tree Ventures!

*Special thanks to Bel of Journeys are my Diary for her help tracking down the original recipe.

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Sofia the First – flat-out cake fail http://craftfail.com/2014/09/sofia-the-first-flat-out-cake-fail/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/sofia-the-first-flat-out-cake-fail/#comments Fri, 26 Sep 2014 15:00:05 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7099 Read More »]]> princess Sofia the first cake

This gorgeous princess cake, inspired by the Disney Junior television series Sofia the First, was baked by Chris Luna, who appeared in season 3 of The Next Great Baker! He posted it to his Facebook account, saying it was for his daughter’s birthday.

Naturally you’ll now see the photo floating all over Pinterest, inspiring people like CraftFail reader Catherine to make versions that look like this:

princess cake fail

Still, seriously, so much better than anything I could’ve made! It looks practically perfect! Well, maybe it looks like a practically perfect Sofia the First cake that was left in a 110-degree sauna for several hours, but still – much better than anything I could’ve made.

princess cake nailed it

For more funny that’s hot-hot-hot, find Robyn at Hollow Tree Ventures!

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Bungled Blueberry Ice Cubes http://craftfail.com/2014/09/bungled-blueberry-ice-cubes/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/bungled-blueberry-ice-cubes/#comments Wed, 24 Sep 2014 15:00:16 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7093 Read More »]]> blueberry ice cube

Ahh, doesn’t this look refreshing? Freezing fruit into your ice cubes seems like such a sweetly simple way to add some subtle flavor to your nice, tall glass of water or tea.

Or vodka. Whatever, I don’t judge.

Instagrammer bisaia warns us, however, “Blueberry ice cubes not as easy as plopping blueberries into an ice cube tray.”

blueberry ice cube fail
I honestly had no idea you could explode blueberries! She commented that you probably had to freeze the berries first, which seems like a logical theory.

However, I tracked down the original fruit-filled ice photo on Country Living, and I think I uncovered the main problem that probably caused this fail – those aren’t blueberries in the inspiration photo. They’re pomegranate seeds.

Oh well, that doesn’t need to keep us from drinking our vodka! I mean, water.

**For more explosive laughs, follow Robyn to Hollow Tree Ventures!**

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That’s the way the rainbow cake crumbles! http://craftfail.com/2014/09/thats-the-way-the-rainbow-cake-crumbles/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/thats-the-way-the-rainbow-cake-crumbles/#comments Mon, 22 Sep 2014 15:00:01 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7085 Read More »]]> Rainbow CakeIt’s easy to see why someone would want to attempt to make this gorgeous rainbow layered cake from how does she?.

It’s also easy to see how an attempt could easily come crumbling down around you, especially after reading this email from craftfailer and attempted baker, Courtney.

I threw my daughter a Rainbow Unicorn 4th birthday party.  When I saw this cake I knew I had to make it.  It would be so dramatic when I cut into in front of all our friends.  I could hear the “oohs” and “ahhs” and the applause!
It was destined to be a fail – first, because I was making it; second, because the ingredients were daunting (coconut oil?  I asked the author about a substitute, and she said vegetable oil would be fine; and 16 cups of powdered sugar?  who has a mixing bowl that big, seriously?).
 
I got the cake mix mixed and divided evenly and got the colors pretty close to what I wanted.  I only had 3 cake pans so I had to cook the green, blue, and purple layers first.  They looked a little flat and bumpy on top, but I didn’t want thick layers since there were so many.  They didn’t have a long time to cool down before I took them out of the pan so I could re-use them.  I went ahead and assembled those layers with icing in between.  Not too bad so far.  It was getting late when the red,orange, and yellow layers were done, so they didn’t get to cool much either, but I went ahead and iced and assembled those on top.  By this time the layers were kind of sliding around and I hadn’t leveled each layer, so I quickly finished up and shoved it in the fridge to chill and hopefully the icing would harden up a little and keep it all together.  Then I would put the final layer of icing on the next day.  I started cleaning up and opened the fridge to put something away and saw that the red and orange layers had completely come apart and slid off.  I thought I was just tired and seeing things, but when I realized it was true, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
 
The next day I ordered a professional boring chocolate cake from our grocery store bakery.  So anti-climactic. 
Rainbow Cake fail
The new cake was a nice touch, Courtney. Since it was already a unicorn rainbow theme, I’d have just found one of those pegasus My Little Ponies and smashed it into the middle. “Oh look, honey – that baby unicorn landed right in your cake!”
Rainbow-Cake nailed it
For more sweet, delicious, funny failure, find Robyn at Hollow Tree Ventures!

 

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Crappy Crochet Dishcloth http://craftfail.com/2014/09/crappy-crochet-dishcloth/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/crappy-crochet-dishcloth/#comments Fri, 19 Sep 2014 15:00:52 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7070 Read More »]]> crochet washcloths

I used to crochet, and as far as I remember it wasn’t terribly hard.

Now wait, before you go getting all impressed, I probably remember it being easy because I never tried to make anything that was even remotely challenging. I stuck to things with very basic shapes and repetitive patterns, like this ribbed crochet dishcloth by Aesthetic Nest.

CraftFail reader and international craftfailer, Linnie, figured it was a simple enough project, too. Should be easy!

crochet fail

“Worse still,” says Linnie, “this is the *third* summer I’ve tried to learn to crochet. I really suck at crochet.”

Suck?!? I wouldn’t go that far! If you have any curly, roughly triangular dishes, your dishcloth is perfect!

crochet washcloths - nailed it

Find Robyn at Hollow Tree Ventures for more funny and more failure!

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A Puzzling Nail Fail http://craftfail.com/2014/09/a-puzzling-nail-fail/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/a-puzzling-nail-fail/#comments Wed, 17 Sep 2014 15:00:56 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7076 Read More »]]> puzzle-nail-art

This fancy puzzle manicure by Polishpedia might look puzzling at first, but it’s really not as tough as it looks!

At least, in theory.

As she explains on Suzy Sitcom, craftfailer Suzy figured she had these nails all nailed down. She followed the tutorial to the letter (mostly), applying a base coat, taping off squares for the puzzle pieces and adding a few dots of color…

puzzle nails fail

That’s one lumpy, bumpy, blotchy puzzle, Suzy! See the full story here to piece together how she nailed this fail.

puzzling manicure - nailed it

Get more laughs at Hollow Tree Ventures, where Robyn fails (and fails to be fancy) regularly!

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What if Pinterest had been around in the ’90s? http://craftfail.com/2014/09/what-if-pinterest-had-been-around-in-the-90s/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/what-if-pinterest-had-been-around-in-the-90s/#comments Mon, 15 Sep 2014 15:00:21 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7066 Read More »]]> If Pinterest Existed In the 90s detail by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

I know, we all love Pinterest – or at least we love to hate it – and most of us can barely imagine our crafty, fashionista-wanna-be, inspirational, DIY, recipe-loving lives without it. But did you realize it’s only been around since 2010? That’s LESS THAN FIVE YEARS! That’s a lot of crafting (and craft failing) in a short amount of time!

When I realized how young Pinterest is, and how old I am, it made me think of something – have you ever wondered what Pinterest would have been like in the 90s? Yes, back before hombre and gender-reveal parties and pumpkin-flavored-everything, Pinterest would have looked preeeeeeeetty different. Join us on an imaginary journey back in time to see what Pinterest might have looked like back in the day!

If Pinterest Existed In the 90s by Robyn Welling @RobynHTVAnd for more funny, you can always pop over and see Robyn’s latest fashion/life/parenting fail at Hollow Tree Ventures!

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Painter’s Tape cul-de-sac of Monotony http://craftfail.com/2014/09/painters-tape-cul-de-sac-of-monotony/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/painters-tape-cul-de-sac-of-monotony/#comments Fri, 12 Sep 2014 15:00:09 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7059 Read More »]]> painter's tape roads

Painter’s tape roads (like this mini-city found in the February 2013 issue of FamilyFun magazine) are a great way to keep your kids occupied indoors for hours. All you have to do is stick painter’s tape on the floor to form roads and parking spots, and you’re all set! There’s no right or wrong way to do it, so how could you fail?

I’ll let CraftFail frequent flier, Alyssa, explain.

It’s me again. Still attempting to be a Pinterest perfect mom with a clearly under stocked craft cabinet (paint chip fail= lack of glue, sensory bottle fail= lack of bottles, painter’s tape road= lack of tape.) Am I picking up on this theme yet? clearly not.

I decided to make a Painter’s Tape road, inspired by Pinterest pictures of vast, sprawling tape highways, neighborhoods, and shopping centers. I laid down my first square and got excited. “This is going to be epic,” I thought. Then, rip! I ran out of tape before my tape road empire had even qualified for it’s first stop light.

As you can see in the pictures, what I ended up with was a single square foot (if you count the rounded corners) of tape, in what I call my Painter’s Tape cul-de-sac of Monotony. My little cross beam there was the only way I could elevate my sad track from being no more than 4 right turns.

What’s even sadder is how much my son LOVED it. Picture him driving his truck around this “awesome” circle for 15 minutes straight. It was sad. I felt bad. I need to buy some tape.

painter's tape roads fail

Alyssa @ myclevernest.com

Well, as they say, Rome wasn’t built in a day. They probably ran out of painter’s tape, too.

Painter's Tape Roads - nailed it

For more laughs and half-assed attempts to make children happy, visit Robyn at Hollow Tree Ventures!

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DIY Air Vase – nailed it http://craftfail.com/2014/09/diy-air-vase-nailed-it/ http://craftfail.com/2014/09/diy-air-vase-nailed-it/#comments Wed, 10 Sep 2014 15:00:44 +0000 http://craftfail.com/?p=7040 Read More »]]> air vase

These decorative vases are made out of paper, but “air vase” is still a pretty accurate name for them, considering air is just about all the delicate beauties will hold.

The retail value for a pre-made air vase is a wee bit high, though, considering it’s nothing but shredded paper. Or at least that’s how many see it, so it’s handy that there’s a DIY air vase tutorial, complete with printable PDF showing you where to cut, on instructables.com! Now, dedicated crafters like Kat can set aside an hour for X-acto knifing some paper slits and make their own!

OR CAN THEY?

air vase fail

You can pop over to How To, How Hard and How Much to see the breakdown on this broken vase – in my grade book, Kat still gets an A+++++++ for patience.

DIY air vase nailed it

For more funny, follow Robyn to Hollow Tree Ventures!

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